I am hoping and praying that the self realization of this sad state I am in, is one step closer to changing it. May Allah make it easier for me to give time to read and soak in his words. I love my religion, I truly love Allah, and I don't want to lose my religion!
PS- Last night was sad, as many people know it was Saudi National Day, and my husband was telling me that on his way home, there were all these teenage boys in the streets putting on loud music and dancing in the streets. One may say... thats fine.. they are showing they are nationalistic.... but the sad reality was, while they were partying in streets, they missed the Qiyam prayers, and obviously had their music playing while the versus of the Quran were heard throughout the city of Riyadh.... We need serious help... Allah yahdeena!